Types of Fostering: Moving to Adoption

Whilst fostering can be long-term, there’s also a need for foster carers who are able to provide short-term placements for children.

Supporting children to move on and transfer their attachments is a big part of short-term fostering, when the plan is adoption. Foster carers play a vital role in helping children transition their trust and attachment to a new ‘forever family’ This well-planned process, which involves the foster carers working closely with the entire child care team, relies on the secure bond that the foster carers have established through the safe and consistent care they have given. By sharing insights and supporting the child’s trust-building with their adoptive parents, foster carers play a major role in helping the child to bond to their new parents, before then stepping back and allowing them to become a family.

Theresa has been a foster carer for over 20 years. During this time she has cared for many children transitioning to their permanent homes, including to adoption.  Here, she shares a recent experience.

“Last year we were blessed to have five-month-old twin baby boys placed with us. We accepted from day one that they would one day leave us, however we loved them unconditionally despite this. We watched them grow and meet their milestones, their little characters forming, enjoying every step.”

“The day arrived when I was introduced to the adopters and, despite feeling nervous, the meeting went really well. Describing these beautiful boys was easy, their new Daddies asked lots of relevant questions, eager to learn about the babies and their routines.”

“When the adopters met the babies face to face it was an emotional day and a very natural process, giving the babies time to accept them at their own pace. I felt privileged to be a part of the process.”

“The introduction of moving the babies to their new home was over the period of a week, during that time we had a carefully planned schedule, to make sure the babies’ needs were being met in terms of the routines they already had and with as little disruption as possible. I tried to cram as much information into that time as I could, preparing the Daddies for what they could expect when they got the babies home. They both made it very easy; they were very understanding of my feelings and that of my family’s in moving the babies on.”

“As the days passed, I gradually handed over the care of the babies to their Daddies, to see them transferring their affections, whilst still feeling secure with us. The day came for me to take the babies to their Daddies’ house for them to move in. The boys’ things had been gradually taken to their new home. I stayed until they went for their afternoon sleep, settling down in their new cots. And then I left.”

“Even though we greatly missed them, there was a satisfaction that the boys had moved on successfully and were settled and content. We receive regular photos, videos and updates. We have also visited several times, the Daddies would like us still to be a part of the new family’s lives. This doesn’t always happen and we feel privileged to maintain a relationship with them as a family.”

Sue Beale, Fostering Manager at Fitzgerald Fostering, said: “We can never underestimate the emotional impact on foster carers of offering such unconditional love to a child and then saying goodbye, supporting them to transfer their affections in such a positive and selfless way.  Foster carers like Theresa make such a difference to the lives of children in care, and we are very grateful to Theresa for sharing her story.”

“At Fitzgerald Fostering, our in-house therapist Baljit Kaur is available to all our carers, giving them direct access to therapeutic support.  We also run monthly Personal Development Sessions for all of carers, which are facilitated by our therapist.  These provide a safe and confidential space where they can share and consider the emotional impact of attachment based caring on relationships, supporting the resilience of the whole family through the highs and lows of fostering.”

She continued: “With more children and young people in care than ever before, there’s an urgent need for foster carers – for both short-term and long-term placements.  If you are considering fostering agencies in the Slough, Reading, Bracknell, Maidenhead, Wokingham or the surrounding area, remember that at Fitzgerald Fostering we are here to support our foster carers to be the best foster carers they can be.”

At Fitzgerald Fostering, we are with you all the way.  To find out more about fostering with Fitzgerald Fostering, please contact us or call us on 01753 550031.