Bobby shares his fostering placement story

At Fitzgerald Fostering we believe that every child, whatever their previous circumstances, has the right to be safe and happy and should be given every opportunity to thrive in a supportive and loving family environment.

It isn’t always easy, we know, but the support our incredible foster carers give to the young people in their care changes lives – and we’re here to support our fostering households all the way.

Recently Bobby*, a young person who has lived with his foster carers for eight years and is now preparing to live independently, spoke to us about how he feels his fostering placement helped him get to where he is today.

Here Bobby shares his story.

My foster carers helped me in so many ways I don’t even know where to begin.

I came from a broken family, then I walked into a home that treated me like family from day one, and still does. That’s something money can’t buy. There are feelings in all of this that are almost impossible to put into words.

If I hadn’t come into foster care, I honestly think I would’ve ended up in the same crowd I grew up around, doing the same things they were doing. Being taken out of that environment wasn’t easy. I lost my mum and dad, and I had to move through different families before I finally settled.

But looking back it was for the best, because I knew exactly where my life was heading if I stayed.

I’m 19 now and I’ve completed my apprenticeship, so I’m qualified in my trade and working full-time.  I’ve passed my driving test and I’m driving the car I always wanted. I’m planning to move into my own flat next year, and right now I’m still living with my carers, David and Jane.

David and Jane will always be two of my favourite people in this world. Not just because of what they’ve done for me, but because of what they still do every single day. They showed me what a real family looks like, what it should feel like, and now I know how to build my own one day — the right way. I’ll create something strong, something stable, something that lasts.  It’s not about how you start, it’s about how you finish.

What makes the biggest difference is when carers take the time to understand you. When they try to see things from your perspective and don’t treat you like just a kid who’s “getting things wrong.”

Many of us in care have gone through things most people never experience. Sometimes we need to be handled a bit more gently – to feel seen, understood, and valued.

I think a great foster carer is someone who knows how to deal with your emotional state, knows your patterns and can help you when you’re struggling with something whether that is just through listening, giving advice or just being there. It always helps. Someone who is consistent, giving you a routine and structure.  They’re trying to prepare you for adult life, and set you up right. Structure is the building block of your success in anything, whether that’s school, business, fitness, timeliness. So whenever you think to yourself, why do I have to put up with this, remember it’s all to try and help you. Embrace it.

There have been countless moments that stand out to me, and a lot of support has come from different places – through Fitzgerald, the council, and even back when I was in school. That support carried on all the way to now, as I get ready to move out.  I’m genuinely grateful for it. Getting to this point has been a real team effort.

As well as David and Jane, I love all the other carers I’ve met through the Fitzgerald Fostering community and who have looked out for me. They’re absolutely brilliant people, honestly.

I really appreciated the times we met up with other kids in the agency to have a meal or do fun things, we’d all feel like family. It’s great to have a laugh with the other kids and make friends, but you feel a sense of closeness with them, and even though you don’t truly know them inside and out, you are still similar, and there’s a sense of comfort with that. That can’t be replicated anywhere else. So thank you to Fitzgerald Fostering for that.

The support from Fitzgerald didn’t stop there. Through school and through my apprenticeship, I had help—whether that was funding for a computer, support for school activities, or even the Fitzgerald Foundation buying tools for work. That kind of support is rare. Honestly, it’s unmatched.

The advice I’d give to a young person going into foster care for the first time is it will feel scary at first. It will feel difficult. Sometimes it might even hurt. But there will also be moments that feel good, and moments that show you why this journey is worth it. You have to learn to ride the rollercoaster. Being away from your family is tough, and even when you get older, you’ll still feel the impact. But I promise you this: it’s for the better.  So many opportunities come from being in care.

Where I am now was only possible thanks to David and Jane and my faith.  I’m forever grateful.

James Townend, Managing Director at Fitzgerald Fostering, said: “Getting to know Bobby over the last eight years and watching him become the successful young man he is today has been a privilege.”

“Bobby has summed up perfectly the experience we strive to offer all children and young people living with our carers – and Bobby’s carers, Dave and Jane, epitomise the dedication and commitment our carers display everyday.”

“Creating a community of carers and professionals, where children form relationships that can change their lives, is why we established Fitzgerald Fostering – and hearing Bobby, David and Jane’s story is truly heartening.”

*Names have been changed in this article to respect confidentiality

If you live in Farnham, Slough, Reading, Bracknell, Maidenhead, Wokingham or the surrounding area and are considering fostering, please contact us to find out more or call us on 01753550031